WHO THE HELL LET THAT BABY LADY IN HERE!!!!!

*i realized something about myself this weekend... i don't like to see stripper completely naked... but i'll get to this later in the blog...*

*also... i sooooo love my readers... yall rock!!! and i looooooooooves your stuff too!*

so... i went out on a date friday... his name is Aaron... but for now we shall call him Ne-Yo... (i'll explain the nickname later...)

i met Ne-Yo at the gym... i had been checking him out for like a month... we would make small talk... he would say stuff like... "girl you need to stop walking around here... looking all cute and workout..." so finally... about a week ago... he walks me to my car... and i get the digits...

back to the date...

i pick him up... (i'm not old fashion at all... plus i don't like niggas knowing where i live...) we head out to Adams Morgan to my favi spot... Evolve...

i realized a few things i don't like about him from the jump...

1... he talks to damn much...

2... the nigga pops gum like a bitch...

so... we get to Evolve... grab a seat at the bar... have some good conversation... eat... and take a few shots...

we then roll down to the hookah bar...

at this point i'm a little tipsy... and when i get tipsy... i start speaking my mind...

i let him know that he pops gum like 20 times... he laughs... and removes his gum... i also notice that he always wears a hat... even in the gym... i ask can i see him without his hat... he seems a little reluctant to remove it... but he does... and i then understand why he always wears a hat... he has the Ne-Yo syndrome...

he then insisted that he needs a hair cut... i then insisted that he needs to stay away from the barber shop... he hasn't called me since friday...

this weekend my birthday month officially kicked off... and we followed the sacred tradition of going to the strip club...

now for those of you that don't know... in Maryland it is against the law for exotic dancers to totally expose themselves... but in D.C. it's fair game...

the show we went to was in D.C.

they got naked... bucket... naked...

and i felt a little disgusted...

now... i love penis... but at this show... it was to much of it in my face...

the venue we went to was hood... i mean... very... very hood... i mean like... big bitch's was bring in popeye's chicken hood... and bringing your own liquor in the building hood... (i brought a couple bottles of wine ... so i still fall under the classy ho category...)

speaking of big bitch's... here's a couple pics... and most of them had on stuff that they should NOT be wearing... i mean... i wouldn't even wear it... (btw... i have nothing against big girls... i'm thick myself... not a Monique thick... more like and Alicia Keys thick...)

these chicks also had rubbermaid containers full of food... out of line...

something else that was out of line about the show was the female strippers... and no... not the one's that dance like girls... and show their boobies and stuff... the one's that dance like boys... i had to leave the room at this point...

yes... that's a girl stripper... picking up a girl... i was as confused as you are right now... and my girl Nicole had this face for the rest of the night cause of it...

these niggas were rookies... and it showed... and one of them was fat... i refused to give them any money...

yep... he's popping his coochie... damn shame...

and i have no clue why this chick had on a prom dress to go see some strippers...

and i have no clue who let this baby lady in there...

highlight of the night....

so in closing... i learned these valuable lessons this weekend...

1. guys that have the Ne-Yo syndrome pop gum


2. baby ladies get more attention at strip clubs than normal ladies


3. make sure you tip your naked engineers... or strippers...

Nola*