all my life... i've told by my parents how pretty... or wonderful... or loving... or giving... or talented... or how i made them so proud... and i actually believed them... i would walk around with my head held high... and shoulders back... thinking that i was God's gift to man... that i was special... and unique...
but with time... age... loves lost... and friends that weren't really friends... i found myself not feeling as marvelous as my parents told me i was... i developed insecurities... (which i still deal with to some extent to this day) i became guarded... to the point i would refuse to make new friends... and i became cold... and made it very difficult for any man to love me...
i was my own worst enemy...
but now... i'm at a point where i'm willing to take chances... and not being caught up in the nostalgia of how i once felt... because that's life... things chance... and you have to as well...
i have started to give the best of myself to every situation... so if and when there comes a time i have to walk away from it... i can know that i did all that i could to make it work... friends... loves... whatever...
and that's the difference between walking through life... and living it...
Nola*
4 comments:
Man. This post was very heartfelt and special. Whenever I hear or read a post surrounding society's definition of a perfect woman, one who shows her vulnerability, then makes sense of it all, and still remain just as beautiful on the inside ... as her parents informed her that she were ... yes, I am definitely feeling it.
Keep your head up. Life, well, it's just life, the good, the bad and the ugly.
I hear that!! Thats what you have to do, give it 100 every single time so you can't look back at it with the woulda, coulda shoulda's.
Well you always feel good when you give 100% at anything you do, its bad that this will not be reciprocated but its life you just have to move on with your head up and shoulder's back as you walked in.
This post really resonates with me. I'm glad for you that you noticed that people were taking from you what your parents gave you and I hope one day you will have it all back.
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